My first Little League home run, the peak of my athletic aptitude.
My first French kiss. The soundtrack was Sublime’s self-titled album when I was in eighth grade. Legendary times.
The first time I drove by myself with an official license. Pure freedom.
Every championship title captured by a sports team in which I have pledged blind, unwavering, borderline-disturbing allegiance. Those chills just never get old.
My wedding day. How I possibly found a beautiful, funny, smart and genuinely kind woman to marry a dude that is very much none of those things is truly beyond me.
And, of course, the three snapshots in time I welcomed each incredible little girl into our family.
These are the moments that define me. The unforgettable, crystal clear, soul-changing slivers of life that create the movie of me. And sorry to be morbid, but I’m guessing these are the pictures that will run through my mind as I share my final breaths (hopefully many years from now).
So when one happens, you take notice. It’s surreal and blurry in real time, but the weight of the moment isn’t lost. I swear your soul glows after your emotions and senses careen back to earth.
This also happened again when my two older daughters met their new sister. Confused, excited, bored, scared, maybe even a little angry. So many big feelings in such a small area of space. They poked and prodded and asked questions and made silly faces, and then they were over it in about five minutes. But within that short window of time, it became immediately clear that despite my best efforts across a professional career, sports obsession, fledgling comedy and mediocre writing, this would be my legacy.
I couldn’t help but feel sorry for them a little. They’d have to call this guy ‘dad’ for the next few decades, putting up with my corny traditions, embarrassing outfits and cringe-worthy jokes. And I’m sure Senior Citizen Ryan will be far worse.
More importantly, I also felt overwhelmingly proud and happy. A small part of me contributed to creating these perfect things and I get a front row seat to watching them grow. They will be inextricably tied to each other forever, the strongest bond of sisters that withstands any external force. They’ll unite for good, making the world better than they found it. They’ll plot mischief, giving mom and dad a run for their money. More than anything, they will be one, a unit built on memories, stories and history.
It was a moment that I truly felt and lived. We grab our phone, center the subject and tap the shutter all too often, opting for posterity in the camera roll of our lives. While I’m glad other family members had the foresight to take on this responsibility, it was refreshing to simply be present. And while I would love to relive all those other defining memories of my life through photos and videos, it’s always fun to think back and daydream of those special times.
I’d like to think there are a lot more memories to come, but I have to force myself to never take them for granted. Every page in the album is just as important as the one that comes before and after. I’m not sure what will come next, but I’ll be ready. Say cheese!